How Do You Feel About Yourself? (Janda, 2001)

The Self-Esteem Rating Scale

This questionnaire is designed to measure how you feel about yourself. There is no right or wrong answer.

1 = Never

2 = Rarely

3 = A little of the time

4 = Some of the time

5 = A good part of the time

6 = Most of the time

7 = Always

1. I feel that people would not like me if they really knew me well.

2. I feel that others do things much better than I do.

3. I feel that I am an attractive person.

4. I feel confident in my ability to deal with other people.

5. I feel that I am likely to fail at things I do.

6. I feel that people really like to talk with me.

7. I feel that I am a very competent person.

8. When I am with other people I feel that they are glad I am with them.

9. I feel that I make a good impression on others.

10. I feel confident that I can begin new relationships if I want to.

11. I feel that I am ugly.

12. I feel that I am a boring person.

13. I feel very nervous when I am with strangers.

14. I feel in my ability to learn new things.

15. I feel good about myself.

16. I feel ashamed about myself.

17. I feel inferior to other people.

18. I feel that my fiends find me interesting.

19. I feel that I have a good sense of humor.

20. I get angry at my self over the way I am.

21. I feel relaxed meeting new people.

22. I feel that other people are smarter than myself.

23. I do not like myself.

24. I feel confident in my ability to cope with difficult situations.

25. I feel that I am not very likable.

26. My friends value me a lot.

27. I am afraid I will appear stupid to others.

28. I I feel that I am an okay person.

29. I feel that I can count on myself to manage things well.

30. I wish I could just disappear when I am around other people.

31. I feel embarrassed to let others hear my ideas.

32. I feel that I am a nice person.

33. I feel that if I could be more like other people then I would feel better about myself.

34. I feel that I get pushed around more than others.

35. I feel that people like me.

36. I feel that people have a good time when they are with me.

37. I feel confident that I can do well in whatever I do.

38. I trust the competence of others more than I trust my own abilities.

39. I feel that I mess things up.

40. I wish that I were someone else.

Scoring:

The following items must be reversed (1=7, 2=6, 3=5, 4=4, 5=3, 6=2, and 7=1): 1, 2, 5, 11, 13, 16, 17, 20, 22, 23, 25, 27, 30, 31, 33, 34, 38, 39, and 40. After reversing these items, add your responses together to obtain your final score.

Norms:

Score Percentile

260 85

244 70

227 50

210 30

194 15

If you scored below the 30th percentile, you undoubtedly deserve to feel better about yourself.

For example, accept that you do not have to be perfect in order to feel good about yourself ;)

Thick-skin...

Hmm... I wonder how some people could have this trait... It might be positive, but i take it as negative...

There is a story behind everything... so let me tell you my story about a thick-skinned person, then you'll understand...

Well, my sister has a boyfriend who is younger, not doing very well in his job, plus he is studying on scholarship, not because he is really all that smart, but because he was able to pull some strings here and there... he is also a trouble-maker or maybe someone who has no social skills... this point might be the opposite of his ability to pull some string right? Well, let's just say that he knows whose show to polish and whose shoe he can throw into the dumpster (ie what bridges he can burn!)

Being used to his usual ways of showing off by saying what he has done, which is nothing much coz this is just his second job, or maybe first coz his first job was just being an intern, then he was not re-hired after the intern... you might know why ;)

He loves starting his sentence with "Do you know..." and then he will tell you something, which you have watched on the Discovery channel :) Yes... that's him... or he will correct you about something very subjective, meaning there is no right or wrong answer to it. For example, the topic on whether chicken or egg came first... no matter what, just let him win... if not, you won't get to stop his high-pitched voice from bursting your eardrums!

Well, going back to the thick-skin story, he passes a lot of sarcastic remarks... I just ignore him most of the time... but recently, after I have presented my research paper with my partner, he told me "I think you guys are bullshitting" I kept quiet for a while... trying to absorb what he has just said in front of me and my sister ie her girlfriend... my sister acted as if nothing happened... he was acting as if he is right, and I feel annoyed, which is what I told him, I said "This is not very nice and now I am annoyed" He acted as if he is still right... and then went on being his fake nice self in front of my parents... I let it go... I already gave up on him and my sister... so I dun quite care much as long as they leave me alone and don't step on me anymore... BUT, being the successful him and smart him, he does not own a car or a place to stay... he stays with my sister in her new apartment and drives her car... so on days she can't pick or send him or lazy to do so, she will ask him to ask me to give him a lift or something... I don't mind doing this to anyone... but don't make it a habit... and the fact that he can be rude to me and in return ask me for favors... its weird to me...

He just send me a text today asking me to drop him home after our night class... what can I say? No? Of course not... so I said yes... but deep down inside, I feel... I dunno... I can't find a word to fit his behavior.... I just am not satisfied having to be treated rudely by him, and then having to be nice to him... worse of all, my sister thinks that he is an angel (I think I juz puked in my mouth)... yeah, she does think so... (roll eyes)

Anyway... what should I do? or what can I do?