Thursday, April 30, 2009

So Cute!!!

Chihuahua born with love-heart pattern
puppy love

"How much is that doggie in the window?
I do hope that doggie's for sale."

A Chihuahua puppy born in Japan with a natural heart shaped pattern on his coat has captured the hearts of animal lovers around the world.

Heart-kun, as he has been named by owner Emiko Sakurada, was born on May 18, 2007, one of a litter of puppies at the Pucchin Dogs shop.

His natural heart-shaped markings on his fur have made him an instant star in Japan. And it was a case of puppy love across the world as the tiny dog made television appearances worldwide.

Shop owner Ms Sakurada got the surprise of her life when she saw the birthmark heart markings in the fur of her tiny pooch.

She said it was the first time a puppy with these marks had been born out of the 1,000 animals that she has bred.

Since Heart-kun was born, he has brought a lot of luck, according to Ms Sakurada. He sister got lucky on the lottery and won a concert ticket.

Heart-kun's owner has been inundated with requests from people wanting to purchase the unique puppy. But they can keep their paws off him, she says, for her little four-legged friend ain't going nowhere!

puppy love

puppy love

Thatsweird.net

Weirdest stories...



  1. Tree Man: I want to get married
    One of many stories about Dede Koswara, the Javanese man with a mysterious skin condition that made him look like a tree. Recent hospital treatments have seen Dede look less like a tree, although there have been fears he may be suffering a relapse.
  2. Student punished for spaghetti beliefs
    A North Carolina student who was suspended from school for dressing up as a pirate, which he claimed was part of his religion - because he worshiped the Flying Spaghetti Monster. The internet was outraged by the creeping fascism.
  3. Man in unfortunate saw-mill penis incident
    An extremely popular, if self-explanatory, story: most of the comments were uncertain if there could ever be such a thing as a fortunate saw-mill penis incident.
  4. The nude wet meat soil bandit
    The story of a naked man who broke into a house, filled the bathroom sink with meat, made a shrine out of a bongo drum and created trails of potting soil throughout the house.
  5. Giant ice penis
    Not so much a story, as a picture:
  6. Goat marriage
    The tale of Charles Tombe, the Sudanese man who in 2006 was forced by tribal elders to marry a goat after he was caught having sex with it, remains one of the most popular stories on the internet several years after it was first published. Every few months, the 2006 BBC article that started it all would jump back to the top of their list of most-read stories. Sadly, the goat - who was named Rose - died in 2007.
  7. Cyclops kitten
    The pictures of Cy, a kitten born with a single, huge eye in the middle of its forehead, rapidly spread around the world in 2006. Many people thought it was a fake - but the pictures were genuine. Cy, who survived for only a few days, suffered from a developmental disorder known as holoprosencephaly.
  8. Four kestrels
    Not necessarily the greatest story of the past ten years - it's a light-hearted animal story, about a farmer whose bedroom was repeatedly invaded in the night by a brood of birds of prey - but undoubtedly the greatest headline. Eternal congratulations go to whichever Hereford Times sub-editor came up with 'Four kestrels maneuver in the dark'.
  9. The 'lightsaber duel' that wasn't
    The two people who supposedly tried to recreate a lightsaber duel by filling fluorescent tubes with petrol - which promptly exploded in flames, severely injuring them both - was passed around online as an example of the pinnacle of human stupidity. As it turned out, their stupidity lay in a slightly different, less Star Warsy - although no less idiotic - direction. Mark Webb, 20, was in fact trying to video a Jackass-style stunt so he could upload it to a website called Retardz. The stunt, in which he broke the petrol-filled tube over 17-year-old Shelley Mandiville's back, engulfed them both in flames. He was subsequently found not guilty of grievous bodily harm.
  10. 'Hippo swallows dwarf'
    A classic tale of a dwarf who, as part of a circus act, bounced off a trampoline and accidentally got caught in a hippo's open mouth, triggering the animal's gag reflex and quickly being swallowed by the animal. The downside of this story is that, while highly amusing, it's even less accurate than the lightsaber story. It's an urban legend that's been doing the rounds since 1994, which occasionally gets picked up by an unwary newspaper and printed - leading to more excited forwarding of the story by the denizens of the internet.
Metro.co.uk

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Food for Hair


Salmon

When it comes to foods that pack a beauty punch, it's hard to beat salmon. Loaded with omega-3 fatty acids, this high-quality protein source is also filled with vitamin B-12 and iron.

"Essential omega-3 fatty acids are needed to support scalp health," says Andrea Giancoli, MPH, RD, a dietitian in Los Angeles and a spokeswoman for the American Dietetic Association. "A deficiency can result in a dry scalp and thus hair, giving it a dull look."

Vegetarian? Include one or two tablespoons of ground flax seed in your daily diet for some plant-based omega-3 fats.

Dark Green Vegetables

Popeye the Sailor Man didn't eat all that spinach for healthy hair, but he could have. Spinach, like broccoli and Swiss chard, is an excellent source of vitamins A and C, which your body needs to produce sebum. The oily substance, secreted by your hair follicles, is the body's natural hair conditioner.

Dark green vegetables also provide iron and calcium.

Beans

Beans, beans, they're good for your ... hair?

Yes, it's true. Legumes like kidney beans and lentils should be an important part of your hair-care diet. Not only do they provide plentiful protein to promote hair growth, but ample iron, zinc, and biotin. While rare, biotin deficiencies can result in brittle hair.

Blatner, who is also a spokeswoman for the American Dietetic Association, recommends three or more cups of lentils or beans each week.

Nuts

Do you go nuts for thick, shiny hair? You should.

Brazil nuts are one of nature's best sources of selenium, an important mineral for the health of your scalp.

Walnuts contain alpha-linolenic acid, an omega-3 fatty acid that may help condition your hair. They are also a terrific source of zinc, as are cashews, pecans, and almonds. A zinc deficiency can lead to hair shedding, so make sure nuts are a regular on your healthy hair menu.

Poultry

Chickens and turkeys may have feathers, but the high-quality protein they provide will help give you the healthy hair you crave.

"Without adequate protein or with low-quality protein, one can experience weak brittle hair, while a profound protein deficiency can result in loss of hair color," Giancoli tells WebMD.

Poultry also provides iron with a high degree of bio availability, meaning your body can easily reap its benefits.

Eggs

When it comes to healthy hair, it doesn't matter whether you like your eggs scrambled, fried, or over easy. However they're served up, eggs are one of the best protein sources you can find.

They also contain biotin and vitamin B-12, which are important beauty nutrients.

Whole Grains

Sink your teeth into hearty whole grains, including whole-wheat bread and fortified whole-grain breakfast cereals, for a hair-healthy dose of zinc, iron, and B vitamins.

A whole-grain snack can also be a great go-to food when your energy is zapped halfway through the afternoon, and you've still got hours to go before dinner.

Oysters

Oysters may be better known for their reputation as an aphrodisiac, but they can also lead to healthy hair -- and who doesn't love that?

The key to their love and hair-boosting abilities is zinc -- a powerful antioxidant.

If oysters don't make a regular appearance on your dinner plate, don't despair. In addition to getting it from whole grains and nuts, you can also get zinc from beef and lamb.

Low-Fat Dairy Products

Low-fat dairy products like skim milk and yogurt are great sources of calcium, an important mineral for hair growth. They also contain whey and casein, two high-quality protein sources.

For some healthy hair foods "to-go," try throwing a yogurt or cottage cheese cup in your bag when you head out in the morning to snack on later in the day. You can even boost their hair benefits by stirring in a couple of tablespoons of ground flaxseeds or walnuts for omega-3 fatty acids and zinc.

Carrots

Carrots are an excellent source of vitamin A, which promotes a healthy scalp along with good vision.

Since a healthy scalp is essential for a shiny, well-conditioned head of hair, you'd be wise to include carrots in your diet as snacks or toppings on your salad.

WebMD

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Food for Skin


Oily fish

Most of us have heard the news that it's good for your brain, but did you know that fish is also good for your skin? Oily varieties of fish - sardines, mackerel, fresh tuna (sadly the tinned stuff doesn't count) and pilchards - are packed full of so-called 'good' fats known as essential fatty acids (EFAs), which can calm inflammation and keep your skin moisturized. So they're especially great if you suffer from dry or sensitive skin and eczema. You need to be eating it up to three times a week to feel and see the benefits. If you can't stomach the taste, try fish oil supplements. Or if you're vegetarian, go for flax seed oil, which contains a plant-based version of the EFAs.

Nuts and seeds

Nuts and seeds are a nutritional powerhouse - in other words they contain a great deal of goodness in a relatively small weight. They're crammed with skin-enhancing nutrients - in particular vitamins A and E. You'll probably recognize these as ingredients in your skin creams. They're known as antioxidants and they protect your body and your skin against pollutants in the atmosphere, as well as sun damage. Like oily fish, nuts and seeds are also rich in good fats to keep your complexion nourished and smooth. Try our favorites, sunflower and pumpkin seeds, almonds and walnuts - add to your breakfast cereal, salads or eat simply as a snack.

Avocado

It's seemingly unassuming - but this scaly skinned, green-fleshed fruit is loaded with loads of nutritional goodies to keep your skin looking great, including vitamin E and 'good' (yep, they're not all bad for you) monounsaturated fats. Again these fats keep your complexion nourished, so they're a must-eat if you suffer from dry skin. Mix avocado into salads or transform it in a guacamole with sour cream and fresh chili.

Extra virgin olive oil

Olive oil is so revered in countries like Italy and Greece that it's also seen as a medicine rather than a simple cooking ingredient - and it's common practice to soothe sunburn and other irritations by applying it directly to the skin. You can also feel the skin benefits by eating plenty of the stuff too. What makes olive oil so skin-beneficial is that it's also blessed with the good fats and antioxidant vitamin E. Plus it has the added benefit of looking after your heart. It can be expensive but if possible use it in place of your regular cooking oil, drizzle on salads, pasta dishes and pizza.

Berries

They taste like sweets, but unlike pick 'n' mix, blackberries, raspberries, strawberries and blueberries are full of goodness for your skin and super-charged with the antioxidants vitamins C and E. Over and above any other nutrient vitamin C is the great skin restorer; it helps produce a 'scaffolding' tissue called collagen, which is vital for keeping the complexion plump and smooth. Best of all, berries are versatile and delicious so it's no effort to add them into your diet; eat them as a dessert, snack or on breakfast cereals.

Spinach

Ever noticed that Popeye has great skin as well as bulging biceps? Probably not. But you can credit his love of spinach for his rude health. Spinach - and other leafy greens like cabbage, kale and watercress are a great source of antioxidant vitamins A, C, E and the mineral iron - essential for keeping your blood healthy and your skin bright. They're also rich in B vitamins, so they have the added benefit of boosting your energy (and so in turn your activity levels and your 'glow' factor). Try adding rocket, watercress or baby spinach to your regular salad and in sandwiches. And, honestly, cabbage doesn't have to be the limp school-dinner affair you're used to - use it raw in salads or in stir fries so it retains some crunchiness.

Mango

Beta-carotene is the nutrient that's supposed to help you see in the dark, and it's crucial for your skin. It also gives mango, and other fruits and veg like carrots, sweet potatoes and apricots, its distinctive orange color. It's converted by your body into vitamin A and is so important that it's often prescribed as a topical treatment (one that's applied directly on to the skin) for acne. Replace your regular baked potato with a sweet potato or try a thick, wholesome carrot and coriander soup. Got a sweet tooth? Whiz up a ripe mango with orange juice or plain yogurt for a healthy breakfast smoothie.

Whole grains

Having a healthy digestion is essential for your complexion - because if your body isn't able to get rid of waste efficiently, toxins will build up and show on your skin. Whole grains, the brown, wholemeal versions of everyday essentials like bread and pasta are packed with fiber for your digestion (which also means they keep you feeling full up), plus iron and another skin-loving nutrient, vitamin B. Swap your usual processed 'white' carbs for wholegrain versions, such as granary bread in place of white sliced loaves and brown rice for your usual long-grain.

Pro biotic yogurt

You've seen the 'friendly bacteria' ads, right? Live yogurts are crammed to bursting with good bacteria - Lactobacillus Acidophilus if you want to be precise - that keep your digestion and hence your skin, in tip-top health. Research shows that a daily intake can help eczema sufferers. Use in fruit smoothies, salad dressings and as an alternative to cream in desserts.

Green tea

It's good for the heart and is increasingly used as an ingredient in top-of-the-range skin creams. The reason? It's bursting with antioxidants, called catechins, which are also said to fight viruses and slow ageing. It's an acquired taste but try to have about one to two cups daily.

TheSite.org

Monday, April 27, 2009

Mondays...


The weekend went by so fast... but I managed to catch up on some sleep and fiance is back to normal... therefore, giving him space is right ;)

Anyway, some simple ways to beat Monday blues....
  1. If you can, sleep in an extra hour on Monday mornings. Going to bed early on Sunday night doesn't always help because most people will remain awake until their usual bedtime.
  2. If you can't sleep in by a full hour (and most of us can't), take action Sunday night to shorten your morning preparation time so that you can set the alarm for 15 minutes later than usual. Wash your hair, pack lunches, lay out your outfit or pack your briefcase on Sunday night.
  3. Hop out of bed the moment you wake up on Monday morning. Lingering in that downy comforter will only draw out the agony.
  4. End your shower with a jolt of cold water to tear yourself out of your grogginess. Or exercise in the morning to get your blood pumping and to release those feel-good endorphins.
  5. Get out in the sunlight. Bright light tells your body that it is indeed the morning and helps reset your internal clock.
  6. Drink coffee or another caffeine beverage. Although it's not healthy to drink caffeine to the point of addiction, caffeine, when used in moderation, can give your Monday mornings that much-needed oomph and alertness.
  7. Anticipate your Monday morning on Friday afternoon. Fight the temptation to race away from a messy desk. Clean up your desk and leave yourself a to-do list to make Monday morning a little more tolerable.
  8. Make Mondays your look-my-best day and should be strictly for wearing the clothes you like most. Even if it means wearing that red shirt/sari you were saving for a special occasion. Instead of the greys and navys, go for bright colors, some of that sunshine yellow or fiery red is bound to rub your blues away.
  9. If you're really down, call up a friend — in all probability, he might be equally blue and would love to hear from you. Or mail your pals and bitch about your blues. As all of them crib about Mondays (this does work!), you'd know you aren't alone and will feel better. Those not big on mails, read something funny, start the day with a smile!
  10. For all you foodies — grab your favorite chocolate and eat it all by yourself, right in the morning. Nothing is better than the guilty pleasure of early-morning-chocolate. A high for sure. You're on a diet? Then make Monday your binge day. Believe you me, food is the best way to beat the blues.
  11. Make sure you finish all the dirty work on Friday itself. Keep Monday for a fresh start. That way, at least there's one thing less to bog you down on a Monday. Now that you know how to chase your blues, have a very happy Monday, remember the weekend's just five days away!
  12. AND this Friday is Labor Day (1st May 2009), so you'll only need to work 4 days this week. Yay!

Saturday, April 25, 2009

However...


We have not spoken for almost a week due to some misunderstanding... I tried explaining, but he seems like not want to talk... So am gonna let him have his time and space as there isn't much I could do if he does not wanna participate in solving the issue... Besides, I don't want situation like this happening: H
is withdrawal only made me more needy, and my neediness only advanced his withdrawals, until soon he was retreating under fire of my weeping pleas of, "Where are you going? What happened to us?" 

So am instead using my time to read another book entitled Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert...

Eat, pray, and love symbolize three distinct journeys Gilbert takes us through after a rough divorce and her quest to find spiritual and personal happiness. Losing her home and most of her income in divorce settlements, Gilbert finds herself completely disillusioned with how quickly her once ideal life falls apart. With no one and no where to turn, Gilbert jet-sets across the world to find the solution to her problems through three outlets: food, spiritual guidance, and the almighty love factor.

Gilbert's first journey through Italy highlights the initial stages of her breakup where she indulges herself in language lessons and all the best pasta and pizza Italy has to offer. In India, Gilbert attempts to fixate her unhappiness through diligent religious devotion. Finally, in Indonesia, she risks being deported on the small chance that a Balinese medicine man who told her two years earlier to return to Indonesia will recognize her and take her under his wing. The Balinese medicine man's role particularly is important in her journey for happiness as he embodies the validation of her struggle: he doesn't recognize Gilbert at first because of her marked happiness. Just two years earlier, she was a completely different person, ridden with grief and sadness. With her happiness, Gilbert finally finds true love in this final part of her journey and, more importantly, when she least expects it.

What makes Gilbert's novel great is her free prose - the book reads like a journal, nothing is held back, as Gilbert brings you inside every step of her thoughts. While it has its funny moments, such as in stories of banana juice, Eat, Pray, Love still manages to cover the deep subject at hand — her road to recovery — by highlighting her dark moments, particularly in Italy, where she feels as though no one would love or support her but herself.

Gilbert's book manages to create a dialogue with her readers that has all the elements and structure of a well-written novel, but also the sincerity of a hurt soul who is really going through a lot of pain and struggle that anyone can identify with, and all the while making the read entertaining.

Even if you are just perfectly happy with life as you have it now, Gilbert's journey as detailed through Eat, Pray, Love still makes you think about what elements in life create lasting happiness within each of us. If I didn't know any better I could swear I was reading a self-help book that was cleverly packaged into something enjoyable to read. I owe this all to Gilbert's sense of wit, inspiration, and openness.

Friday, April 24, 2009

PDA!!! ;p


  1. I love my fiance a lot... like really a lot
  2. When he's out-station, I had to sleep on his side of the bed and have his t-shirt because I need his smell
  3. I'm very very comfortable with him i.e. I'm not shy at all
  4. When I was in the states, I took his t-shirt with me... even when I go back to my hometown for a weekend... I need his t-shirt
  5. I miss him all the time
  6. Therefore, I text him telling him I love him and I miss him frequently...
  7. I love having him around
  8. We don't need to talk a lot... but just spending time with him is good for me
  9. I love hugging him
  10. I love sleeping on his chest
  11. I hug his hand to sleep ;p
  12. I kiss his cheeks when I feel like it
  13. I happily cook for him after work because I want him to have home cooked food
  14. My parents love him and vice versa
  15. I care for him a lot
  16. He is the closest person to me
  17. He is my not my best friend but my 'bestest' friend
  18. I tolerate some of his friends because I want him to not feel uncomfortable
  19. I don't speak Indian, but I'll look up online on how to tell him I love you in Tamil
  20. I did the same in French since he speaks French
  21. I make sure his toiletries are stocked up
  22. I get him his newspaper most mornings, from the porch :)


AND
  1. He loves me too
  2. He cares for me
  3. Encourages me to chase my dreams
  4. Cheers me up all the time
  5. Always there when I need him
  6. Makes sure I am happy
  7. Text and calls me to tell me he loves me
  8. Never wants me to worry about anything
  9. As he takes care of almost everything
  10. Lets me do what I want
  11. Gets me anything I want... without me asking ever
  12. Learned how to play the guitar and still trying to play for me... and still trying to write me a song
  13. Wrote me a really long love letter once while I was sleeping
  14. Takes care of my well-being
  15. Plans everything for the future so that I have a good life
  16. Wants the best for me
  17. Supports me emotionally and financially
  18. Cares for my sisters
  19. Sings and dances for me
  20. When I was in the states, he DHL-ed me puzzle books because I love them
  21. Lets me be myself
  22. Accepts me for who I am
BUT


  1. We always take turns to compromise
  2. We tell each other how we feel
  3. We are open to each other
  4. Do not hold grudges
  5. Past is the past and do not bring up old things in current disagreements
  6. We have arguments like other people, but we always want to patch things up
  7. We don't like being angry at each other
  8. Apologize when we are wrong
  9. Do not take each other for granted
  10. Appreciate each other

Scorpio Leo Compatibility


Leo is as stubborn as a Scorpio and both of them are also proud and determined. Their strong character is what binds them and it is what creates the differences also. Confused? Don't be. A Scorpio and a Leo are drawn by each others strong resolve, strong sense of commitment and strong will power. But then, all these qualities make them a little stubborn too and they refuse to see each others viewpoints. This is when the trouble starts. Another major roadblock in the compatibility of this relationship is that both the individuals are extremely jealous.

On top of that, both of then are very popular with the opposite sex. The Scorpion may find the Lion much less intense and emotional that himself. At the same time, he cannot flatter anyone, which wouldn't go down too well with the latter. The power of this relationship can last as long as neither of them tries to dominate the other. The moment this situation occurs, you can hope to hear the swords clashing. Otherwise, this love match is one of the best and when a Scorpio and a Leo get together, they can conquer the whole world. Only the power balance has to be maintained.

Leo Man and Scorpio Woman
The zodiac match of a Leo man and a Scorpio woman will have to face a lot of difficulties in the long-term. Different personalities, but similar temperaments, are what lead to all the problems. He looks for romance, which is full of adventure, fantasy and excitement. She, on the other hand, looks for intensity in a relationship. Public displays of affection, which he loves, are not her cup of tea at all. Their aggressive, strong-willed personalities are bound to clash every now and then, leading to more fights than romantic songs!

Leo Woman and Scorpio Man
A Scorpio man is a little short on patience and this will not contribute anything positive to his relationship with a Leo woman. She is in the habit of throwing tantrums every now and then, which he will find difficult to digest. Too much display of affection is also beyond him and she will not be able to give him the intensity he desires in a relationship. Both of them have an irresistible urge to dominate and neither of them can take bossism easily. The only way to make this relationship work is to give in to each other by turns and control the temper.

The LEO Woman: Linda Goodman


* 'Tis an honor to see me, a favor to hear:

'Tis a privilege high to have dinner and tea Along with the Red Queen, the White Queen And me!"

There's one thing the Leo woman probably owns that you won't like. A scrapbook of pictures and mementos from all her old boyfriends. It's no use trying to get her to burn it, because the lioness is sentimental.

She's not a wallflower. She's a sunflower. Chances are she's ridiculously popular, and you'll have plenty of com­petition if you want her to descend to using your name for the rest of her life. You will be a few leaps ahead if your name is St. Hoyme or Mountbatten, Cabot or Lodge. Anything that sounds royal or noble or important. I hon­estly can't imagine a Leo woman marrying anybody with the name Carbunkle or Smith. It's possible. Anything is possible. But she'll probably change Smith to Smythe.

Most likely, she'll be the social leader of her group, lording it over lesser women like a queen, but with such disarming warmth and such a beautiful smile, no one really minds. Perhaps the other girls sense she was born to rule and dictate styles, customs and manners. Anyway, it wouldn't do much good to try to usurp her authority.

Nature seems to have shown some prejudice when she fashioned the lioness with enough vivacity, cleverness, grace, beauty, and just plain sex appeal for at least three women, with some left over. If you're the victim of an inferiority complex, you'd better set your sights on a bird with less brilliant feathers. Don't expect to tame her into a docile little maid who hangs on your every word. The man who expects a Leo girl to worship at his feet is living in a fool's paradise. Consider yourself lucky if she meets you halfway, respects you, is willing to be your partner and allows you to possess her emotionally. By the very act of permitting you to love her, she's practically knighted you, for heaven's sake. Seriously, you could do-a lot worse. A lioness is a lot of woman. She's rather a luxury item, not available in the bargain basement.

It pays to remember that the Leo female can act up a storm, and pretend to be as sweet and harmless as a bowl of jelly beans. She may have a voice like a whisper, gentle, courteous manners and big, soft eyes that sparkle delight­fully when she bats her lashes. A Leo female can appear to be as smooth and calm as a cool and placid lake. On guard. That's just a role she assumed because it got good reviews. Remove her as the star of your love production, cast her in the part of the understudy or second lead, and you'll soon find out just how shy and submissive she isn't. Of course, most of the Leo women to whom you pay homage will openly make it clear that they're too proud and dignified to take any nonsense. I'd just hate to see you stumble in case you get involved with the other kind of lioness, who hides hei claws, but sharpens them every day just the same.

The first step when you're courting this girl is to go prepared with gifts. It doesn't make much difference what they a-e, so long as they're expensive, in excellent taste, and you're dressed properly when you offer them. Then you should practice different ways of complimenting her. Please be original and creative. Phrases like "You send me, Baby," and "You're really cool, sweetheart," will get you thrown right out of the palace, back with the peasants, Vulgarity and slang both leave her ice cold. Remember, you're wooing royalty. She can't exist without flattering appreciation, but keep in mind that she admires your masculinity, and she has no desire to turn you into a hen­pecked weakling. A Leo woman couldn't love you if you weren't strong. It's just that she won't permit you to insult her with a condescending attitude. In her mind, she is definitely not the weaker sex.

Lots of Leo girls are athletic and enjoy sports, but you'd be smarter to take your lioness to the theater than to the ball park. The stage and footlights will never fail to magnetize and transfigure her. (Better buy orchestra seats. Forget the balcony.) Choose a play in which the heroine behaves the way you want her to behave that night, and your chances are better than average that she'll act the part unconsciously and never miss an inflection. After the festivities are over, don't take her to a hamburger stand and expect her to sit at the counter munching french fries because she's so much in love with you. You're better off to take her out less often to more glamorous places. She's not necessarily a gold digger; in fact, she's usually generous -she won't object to frequent Dutch dates and she'll probably shower you with almost as many gifts as you give her. But she's just plain uncomfortable in shabby sur­roundings. The poorest Leo woman in the world will manage to accumulate enough pennies to buy draperies for the windows, rings for her fingers and bells for her toes. Now and then she may go slumming, out of curiosity, but only as a spectator, aloof from the crowd. Poverty de­presses her and makes her physically ill. If you dress like a slob and offer her a shack, you haven't got a chance.

There's a story about a noble Frenchwoman who turned to her lover in the gardens of Versailles and asked, "Dar­ling, do the common people know this exquisite emotion of love?" When she was assured that they did, she cried out in injured surprise, "It's entirely too good for them!" She was probably a Leo.

Don't blame the lioness for her occasional arrogance and vanity. It's her nature to feel herself above the common masses. People seldom resent it, because the Leo woman who's warmly loved and respected can be the kindest and most generous of females, with a womanly compassion for children and for the helpless and the forsaken. You can't really expect her to step down from a throne that's her birthright. If she's a typical Sun child, she's so gracious and dazzling that most people gladly give her credit for being out of the ordinary. Truthfully, she is. She's intelli­gent, witty, strong, and capable, yet deliciously feminine at the same time. No one in his right mind could call that common.

A little flattery will get you everywhere with your Leo lady. You've already found out it's her secret weakness. And here's another secret, if you plan to marry her:

eventually, she'll tire of her gilded cage and want to roam the jungle to see what's doing with all the other cats out there. Confinement inside four walls and under one roof can soon rob her of her sparkle. Let her have her career. Shell wither on the vine if she's forced to be just a haus-frau, unless you have enough money to allow her to be a constant hostess and an extravagant home decorator.

The Leo girl usually makes a jewel of a wife. You'll sel­dom see her dressed frumpily in a tatty bathrobe, wearing curlers and wrinkle cream. Not that she skips the beauty treatments. The typical lioness will spend hours in front of the mirror and a fortune on cosmetics, but she wants you to see the results, not the strategy. There may be times when you feel you're supporting her hairdresser's entire family. Many a husband of a Leo woman finds himself pleading, "Honey, do you have to spend so much money at the beauty parlor?" But few lionesses like to do their own hair. A shampoo and set makes them feel pampered, and feeling pampered does something for every Leo.

Unless she has a Cancer, Virgo or Capricorn ascendant, you may have to watch her with charge accounts. Leos easily slip overboard when it comes to spending for fine feathers, furnishings for the home or gifts for friends. Her wardrobe can be quite extensive. She can look luscious in evening gowns, dripping with sequins and rhinestones, or low-cut, dressy outfits. But she'll probably prefer casual clothes and sportswear, if she's a typical Leo girl. She likes tailored cuts and rich materials, but not necessarily frills and ruffles. Soft cashmeres, good Italian knits and im­ported English tweeds are her favorites. Her taste is usually excellent, if a bit expensive. An occasional Leo woman will overdo and bury her sense of style in gaudy, shocking clothes, but she's an exception to the general rule of the traditional leonine exquisite flair for fashion.

You'll find her a superb hostess when you bring the boss home for dinner. He'll think you're a genius to have won her. She'll probably make a hit with his wife, too, because the lioness is popular with both men and women, and each sex gets treated to her friendly smile and her outgoing personality equally. Anyone who happens to be standing in her bright sunlight feels the warmth. Leos seldom cast a shadow.

As a mother, shell pour love on her children generously and lavish affection on them. It won't be easy for her to see their faults, but when she does, she'll be strict. Since she can't stand being taken for granted, if the children don't respect her she can pout in regal silence. Many Leo mothers have a peculiar way of spoiling the child without sparing the rod, quite a contradiction when you think about it. She may romp and play with her cubs, have long, chummy talks with them, but shell also teach them to snap to attention like soldiers, polish their manners, and be obedient to their elders. At the same time, there's a danger of providing a shade too much spending money, and giving in to requests for luxuries. In a way, you might say she treats her offspring like petted members of a royal family, deeply loved, but expected to mind their p's and q's, especially in public. She'll be fiercely proud of their accomplishments, and heaven help the outsider who at­tempts to hurt them or judge them unfairly. With all this, she won't smother the youngsters. She's too independent to hover over them every second. She'll lead her own life, keeping a watchful eye out for her cubs, from a distance. Many Leo women are working mothers, but their young­sters seldom starve for attention. The career-minded Leos usually manage to balance motherhood and a job with perfect aplomb.

There are times when she'll lose her dignity and poise and become a rollocking, playful lioness, with a flair for pure slapstick. She can roar with laughter like a healthy animal, but when the moment is gone, the satin voice and regal bearing return. No one can squelch a fresh re­mark or a rude question with as much cold contempt as a Leo female. She doesn't appreciate familiarity from stran­gers. Although she'll clown around and be surprisingly casual with intimates, outsiders are expected to keep their place.

In the area of faithfulness, the Leo woman may remind you of the old toast, "Here's to me and here's to you, and here's to love and laughter-I'll be true as long as you- not a single minute after." Enough said.

Don't be jealous of her knack for being the center of attention in a roomful of admiring males. Heads always turn when the lioness smoothly glides by. She feels it's only natural for men to pay court to her. She may encour­age masculine compliments and indulge in light, innocent flirtations, because her deep need for applause and adula­tion covers a strange fear that she's not feminine enough and she must constantly reassure herself that she's de­sirable. It doesn't mean she's not still in love with you, just because she smiles at your best friend and tells him she adores his new sports jacket. But don't try telling her best friend you like her new 나 irt. That's a whole different ball game. What's sauce for the gander is not sauce for the goose, to reverse the old nursery rhyme. If she hears you call your secretary anything much more intimate than "Miss What's-her-name," your purring kitten may scratch.

Of course, it's not fair. But if you want to be the proud possessor of all those gorgeous brilliantly-colored feathers, you have to make a few concessions. After all, owning a peacock is hardly the same thing as owning a cuckoo bird or a cooing pigeon. Humor her vanity. She'll probably be important in her own right, because few Leo women can resist competing with men for prestige, if not income. Your lioness could be anything from an actress to a surgeon.

One of my best friends and favorite Leos is a well-known New York psychiatrist. Granted, it's a career which permits her to lecture and advise (Leo's favorite pastime), but she gives her counsel with such a warm smile, sparkling eyes and deep compassion, her patients feel better just being in the same room with her. Her husband pays her all the respect and adoration she demands as her royal right, but he has a profession of his own to match hers. He's a gifted writer and poet, talents which always impress the senti­mental Leo. They share equal billing in front of the foot­lights, yet he's the man and the boss behind the scenes. A perfect success formula for taming the lioness.

And that's the key to a smooth relationship with your Leo girl. Don't let her smother you-but don't try to top her. Just paste a big, bright star on her dressing room door, and puff up your ego. You're quite a guy, you know-to have won the hand of the proud lioness. Tell me, how did you manage to do it?

The SCORPIO Man: Linda Goodman


And her eyes immediately met those

of a large, blue caterpillar

that was sitting on the top with its arms folded, quietly

smoking a long hookah . . .

The caterpillar and Alice

looked at each other in silence,

If you're in love with a Scorpio male and the word passion frightens you, put on your track shoes and run as if King Kong were pursuing you. He is.

I'm not speaking of romantic passion alone, though that may be at the head of the list. I also refer to pas­sionate intensity about politics, work, friendship, religion, food, relatives, children, clothing, life, death and any other categories you can think up. A Scorpio man is not exactly what your psyche needs if you're repelled by emotional excess. Don't look back. Just run.

You'll think I've taken leave of my senses if you've just met that particular Pluto person. He's so calm and steady. How could anyone with such obvious self-control be passionate, let alone dangerously so? How indeed. Be­cause he's only bluffing with the surface cool. Inside, his passions are as red hot as that stove you burned your hand on when you were three or four years old and getting into things out of your reach. This man may also be out of reach. He's sizzling underneath his deceptively controlled manner. Don't touch. You know perfectly well how long it takes for bums to heal. Remember? Your hand was stinging for weeks after that episode with the stove when you were in your Buster Browns. After this experience, your heart will burn for months, maybe years, and first aid kits will do little good. Grandma's favorite saying, "An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure," applies to both stove burns and Scorpio singes, so play it safe. Make sure you know where you're going and with whom.

If your Sun sign gives you an asbestos, fireproof nature, go ahead and play with explosives. You may be able to keep the flames under control and have yourself a powerful fire to warm your heart for a lifetime. Perhaps you're pas­sionate about things yourself. Fine. Then it's simply a mat­ter of degree of heat. If your passion has an automatic thermostat, so it can be turned down to cool when his reads hot, you're safe. Let's pretend you are. The girls who are in danger should be in the next state by now, if they ran fast enough. They'll thank me someday after they've married a nice, safe Libran or Cancerian.

As for you women who have analyzed yourselves as safe in a Pluto relationship, let's see if we can find what's hidden behind those hypnotic, piercing Scorpio eyes. It's pretty certain he hasn't made a neutral impression on you. He's either got you thinking he's boyish and sweet, or that he's wicked and passionate. (There goes that word again.) The trouble is, he's neither. Or maybe I should say he's both. Well, this isn't getting us anywhere. Let's start all over again.

In a word, this man is invincible. Just behind his frosty reserve is a huge pot of boiling steam that bubbles and seethes continually. If you're lucky, he'll keep the lid on. tight for a lifetime, but a deep injury can blow it right off with a brilliant explosion. It's kind of fascinating to watch. if you're not in its direct line of destruction. Step aside, if you feel it coming. And don't do anything to cause it yourself.

Hell bewilder you with his twin Scorpio traits of passion and reason. He's master of both: intellect and emotions rule him equally. Scorpio is more than intelligent. If he's a highly evolved specimen, he's also deeply philosophical, concerned with mysteries of existence, and he'll come close to knowing the answers.

There are Scorpios who can live a spartan existence in a bare room, denying themselves every comfort for some obscure, aesthetic reason, but the true nature of the sign is sensual. Normally, Scorpio will surround himself with luxury. He'll lean toward excesses in food, drugs, drink, and yes-in love. Most assuredly in love. He's geared for it, with confidence. Romance will never frighten him, puz­zle him, or catch him unaware. It's been on his mind ever since he rode his first bicycle. Maybe even his first tricycle. Of course, you could conceivably know a Scorpio who is so absolutely innocent-looking, with such disarming, youthful charm and lack of obvious seductive mannerisms, he's convinced you that passion is over-rated in Pluto males. He may even have freckles, and a whole drawer full of Boy Scout merit badges. But ask his wife. Try some­thing like, "Say, Bertha-or Rosalie-or Sheila-or what­ever-is your husband, well, is he passionate?" She might summon enough dignity to tell you it's none of your busi­ness, but your answer will most likely be hysterical laugh­ter. Between her peals of mirth, she'll be remembering many days of his intense, passionate declarations about air pollution, housebreaking the dog, narcotics, long hair, birth control, and many nights of ... well, and many nights. This will be true even if her husband looks like Huckle­berry Finn, and doesn't even remotely resemble King Kong.

These men have an explosive temper that can strike a life-time wound. When the Scorpio lashes his deadly tail, the sting bites hard. He not only enjoys winning, he has to win. Something inside him dies when he loses, even in small ways; yet oddly enough, a Pluto man normally prac­tices good sportsmanship. Like all his other emotions, dis­appointment never shows on those set features, and his reactions are rigidly controlled, including his romantic in­tentions. If there's a good reason to avoid the relationship, hell bum inside while he's projecting a glacial calm out­wardly. He's also capable of torturing a girl cruelly before he finally decides to grab her by the hair and drag her off to his jungle of honeysuckle vines. Naturally, there are some November fellows who will gently propose on bended knee. They'll behave very properly, with or without a chaperone, but don't be deceived. It's merely the Scorpio desire to keep dignity at all cost. Your reputation must be spotless. He won't stand for ridicule or cheapness, for all his erotic nature.

Pluto people can have either a Sunday School teacher horror of sin, an attitude which produces intensely dedi­cated evangelistic religious leaders, like Billy Graham, or they can be driven by curiosity to penetrate every dark corner of the human mystery. Sometimes, both attitudes are combined, resulting in the hypocrisy or self-delusion of an Elmer Gantry or a Reverend Davidson in Rain.

Every Scorpio is a law unto himself, and completely un­concerned with what others think of him. He would like to be respected as a good, solid citizen, but if it interferes with any of his intense ideas or goals, then he couldn't care less, and those who gossip can just go to the place Pluto rules. None of his important decisions are hampered by the opinions of his friends, relatives, neighbors or enemies. I'm sorry to say, not even by you. Don't run away yet. Such beautiful self-containment and sureness of purpose can create a mighty attractive, free spirit who's not always fussing about what people think. Are honesty and courage and integrity such bad bargains? They may have lost a little of their sparkle in today's marketplace, but rub off the dust they've collected, and you can still get them appraised as genuine.

It's quite an experience to see the Scorpio man operate under adversity's black clouds. While others are mumbling and crumbling and grumbling, he is at his forceful, cou­rageous best. He seldom wallows in envy or self-pity, and he doesn't happen to think that life owes him a single farthing. You can just imagine how much time that saves. Instead of pouting in hurt anger when real troubles hit, he meets them head on. Conquer them? But of course.

That's what he was born to do.

One thing is a little frightening, and may require courage on your part. Scorpio loves mystery and there's not a single one that crosses his path he won't solve in detail. Since the eternal feminine mystery is any girl's most potent defense and offense, being stripped naked of your mystery can leave you feeling a little exposed. You'll scarcely have a secret left when he starts probing with those burning eyes and piercing questions.

He has high standards, and he won't choose his friends loosely. They'll have to measure up. This is a marvelous, rare kind of man who can share a jug of spirits and joke with rough humor among other men like a bawdy Eliza­bethan; then tap that deep, inscrutable nature and turn into as gentle and tender a lover as Robert Browning. If there's anything more to ask for in a male animal, I don't know what it might be. Submissiveness and forgiveness? Detachment and caution? That's not fair. You knew he was short on those qualities back in the beginning.

He can be cruel sometimes, for his own, unfathomable reasons, and he may even exhibit a sadistic sense of wit by describing you as fat, dumpy, shrewish and square in front of friends. It's his private joke. Grin, if it kills you. You've been warned that Scorpio is compelled to conceal his motives, and this tendency isn't watered down in love. It may even be intensified. He's not about to display his true emotions in front of the world like a vulnerable, smitten schoolboy. Later, when you're alone, he'll tell you what he really thinks.

Marriage gives you a certain security, but if he pulls some of his Pluto tricks before the knot is tied, it may hurt, and you'll fail to get the humor. Still, don't even think about telling him that his harsh, self-sufficient who-needs-you? game makes you feel like jumping off a bridge. The Scorpio man will just tell you to go ahead and jump. It may take a while to adjust to his personality, but it will eventually toughen you up. If you're too soft, you'll bruise easily with a Scorpio. Never ask him what he thinks of a new dress or hair-do, unless you're prepared to be stung by the brutal truth. At least you'll know his positive state­ments are honest, and not pasted together with the sticky glue of bored, insincere flattery. It's better to brave a good, healthy "You look awful," now and then, and be rewarded by an occasional "You're really beautiful, you know," than to swallow a constant diet of vague remarks like: "Yes, dear, it's lovely, sugar. Mmmmm-just fine, pigeon," from other men. Don't you think so? I do. But then, you're the one who has to live with it.

When it comes to jealousy, you'd better tread very, very carefully. He could bum and erupt like Mount Vesuvius in its heyday if you should accidentally wink near a man when a cinder gets in your eye, and if you ever give him a real reason to be suspicious, you're a very brave woman. But you'd better pack away your own jealous streak in the trunk, and then lock it. It will make no impression at all to drench him in angry tears or reproachful recriminations. No matter how he behaves, just say to yourself, "He loves me, and he will never discard real love for physical promiscuity. He's loyal to his deep ties, and he's only practicing his hypnotic art with those girls." Say it once before each meal, in the morning and at bedtime. Especially at bedtime. Women will find him irresistibly attractive, but keep remembering that if anyone is strong enough to resist such continual flattery and temptation, it's a Scorpio. Doesn't that make you feel better? It should. It's true.

He'll probably be a stern father. The children won't get away with an ounce of lazy or frivolous behavior. Hell teach them to respect property, but he'll also teach them to respect themselves. Youngsters will seldom get the chance to form any false values around a Scorpio papa. Although he'll love them with as much sincere passion as he puts into everything else he cares about, he won't Stand for any nonsense. He'll protect them when they need it, but they'll soon get the message that he expects them to stand alone. If they borrow money from him, he's liable to charge them interest on it, but it's for their own good. They may not realize that until he's gone some-day, but the lesson will eventually come home to them. Lots of children of Scorpio fathers resent his high-handed authority and tight discipline throughout childhood, and especially during the rebellious years, but as adults, they realize how lucky they were to have his firm guidance. From no other father can children learn so much truth about the way life really is. Often his offspring will find him gentle and funny; still there won't be any question about who is boss. He'll joke and laugh with them, and give them a sense of freedom, but the chalk line will be drawn, and they'll know not to cross it. Even as they resent his attitude of command, the children will secretly admire his strength and try to imitate it, but occasionally it works the other way. A gentle child may feel bullied and cowed by Scorpio power, and retreat into neurotic intro­version, fearing to risk his displeasure. Then you'll have to remind him that affection and tenderness sometimes get more results than his normal, unbending, autocratic manner. Just be sure you remind him tactfully and respectfully. A Scorpio man will never allow a woman to dictate to him. Never in a million years. He is the man and you are the woman, and if you have any doubts about it, you will be set straight so surely that you'll never need but one lesson. Yet, a Scorpio husband with a wife who truly understands him, will be tender, sympathetic, considerate, and repay her loyalty with the kind of love most women only read about and wish for.

It won't help much to try to resist this man, once the flame has been stirred and he's decided he wants you. Hell hypnotize you right out of all your good intentions. The magnetism of Scorpio men is almost tangible. You feel you can reach out and touch it. When you do, you may get a surprise. It will bum you only if you're over-sensitive and scorchable. If you're patient and strong, it will be like touching cool marble. Girls are out of their league with him. It takes a brave woman to fly with the eagle and not crash. He can soar higher than his symbolic bright star Antares in the constellation of Scorpio, then dip down suddenly to earthy expression. Hang on tightly, but keep your eyes open wide, and you'll see horizons with him the timid will never see. Look over there, just beyond the tall fir trees-did you ever in your whole life experience such a sunrise? Sunset will be just as grand.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Lifetime...


I was reborn when I was broken
I wouldn't believe, I wouldn't believe, no
been thru a storm, no use in hoping
that you would come rescue me
somehow your love set me free

And I, I can let my life pass me by
or I can get down and try
work it all out this lifetime
work it on out this time
I can let it all pass me by
or I can get down and try
work it all out this lifetime lifetime

There was a time when love wasn't chosen
now I'm just open for more
now I'm just reaching out for something better
that I had before, girl
there ain't a bottom line in your world

Ooh and I, I can let my life pass me by
or I can get down and try
work it all out this lifetime
work it on out this time

I can let it all pass me by
or I can just try and try
I can move to the light
oh if I take it one day at a time (oh I)
oh spread my love out and fly
oh I (I can move to the light)
ooh I can just make you understand
that love is not a fairytale in a melody
if you want it you can have it girl
maybe you will see maybe you will see (ooh ooh)
ooh oh oh wo oh
lifetime lifetime

By Maxwell

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Questions Of An Unhappy Lover

People do start asking a lot of questions when their relationship is not satisfying... Some common questions that I have heard are:
  1. What is going on?
  2. How it escalated till this stage?
  3. Why does he/she has to be like this?
  4. How come he/she became like this or changed?
  5. Am I not good enough?
  6. What else he/she needs from me?
  7. When will this be over?
  8. What has caused this?
  9. Is there someone else?
  10. Who started it?
  11. Whose fault is it?
  12. Why can't he/she patch things back?
  13. Why such a small thing could be blown out into a huge thing?
  14. When will he/she ever change?
  15. Will this be forever?
  16. Do I have to endure?
  17. Do I deserve being treated this way?
  18. Am I important in his/her view?
  19. Dis he/she ever loved me?
  20. What should I do?


The questions will just continue adding up until we decide to make a change... Change is difficult in the beginning because it takes a lot of fitting in and getting used to... But once we are in it, we know it is for the better. Deep down inside, we all know change is for the better, but we are afraid of changes, afraid to leave our comfort zone, and afraid of what others might think or say... We can never make everyone happy, so quit trying. Most important... make yourself happy. If you don't love yourself, you can't make someone love you.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Love Mathematics



According to Sternberg, the three basic components of love are commitment, passion, and intimacy. Meaning, with the presence or absence of these three components, comes the different types of love relationships.

Commitment - engagement or involvement
Passion - fondness or desire
Intimacy - close, familiar, or affectionate

  1. - C - P - I = Non-Love
  2. - C - P + I = Liking
  3. - C + P - I = Infatuation
  4. + C - P - I = Empty Love
  5. - C + P + I = Romantic Love
  6. + C + P - I = Fatuous Love
  7. + C - P + I = Companionate Love
  8. + C + P + I = Consummate Love
In my opinion, these are too clear cut and could not be applied especially to relationships that have been many years. After a while these components will not be so prominent as things will plateau or go back to normal. Thus, this does not mean that the relationship is not complete or imperfect. Besides, there is NO perfect relationship ;) Only through give-and-take and tolerance from both parties, only there will be lasting or at least an average relationship.

I feel that one should not bank in too much in relationships. Do not let it decide your happiness, completeness or wholeness, or even as being normal or abnormal. Rules are set by us humans, so we could also change it according to our liking and comfort. When there is no hard and fast rules or social pressure, we tend to make better and clearer choices based on what we want to be and not what others want us to be. Live for yourself if u have not already...

When Love Turns Sour


Female said boyfriend used to get into trouble by getting drunk when he was out drinking with the guys... Troubles like fights, accidents, losing things, slept off in car, too drunk to remember what happened and so on.

She has spoken to him nicely, argued with him, leave him, explain to him... but he always comes back with the same dialogue, "I am sorry, I will never do it again, I promise." But he is still doing it, though not as bad like how it used to. However, he has started lying, not telling his whereabouts and not even answering phone calls.


After so many times, female confronted boyfriend, but he did not want to talk about it. Instead, like how he always tries to avoid the topic, gets angry and tells her "You go la," "Do whatever you want," "Go away," and the list just goes on... feeling hurt and angry, female smack his hand, which he was sleeping on. He got up and started shouting at female saying how dare she slap him. But she said she only smack his hand and not slap him.



He got so furious that he took a full opened can of soft drink and threw it at her... continue shouting, he then took the pack of rice she bought for him and threw it at her and kick it all over the place till the rice is almost everywhere in the house...
He then said to her, "You slap me in my own house! From today onwards I will be a bastard!" Female kept explaining that she did not slap him but only smack his hand... I guess he was filled with rage because female said he did not seem to hear anything she was saying but continued shouting and then bang the front door on the wall when he opened it and then walked back to her and hit hard on the glass sliding door before he drove off...

She was in a bit of pain as the can hit her chest... but she got up, cleaned the whole house of rice and the soft drink, which was on the wall, floor, sofa, and carpet. After cleaning up, she knows he will not want to sleep in the same room as her because he will normally sleep downstairs in the hall whenever they argued. So she decided to sleep in the other room... She could not sleep as she was thinking, "Why has he become like this? What is going on? How could he get physical with her? and Where is he?"

She soon slept off, though waking up every hour or so... by the time she woke up to get ready for work, she noticed that he is back and sleeping in the bedroom. She was still quite shocked over what happened... the whole day at work, she was disturbed by the incident and according to her... towards the end of the day in the office, she actually searched online on how to commit suicide.



She said this is not the first time she felt like committing suicide after going out with this boyfriend. She never did it because she thought of her father... she let the thought slip and went for dinner with her sister... after dinner, she went home, tidied the house and boyfriends clothes, which is everywhere. She then went back to the other room, which is her bedroom now... and thought about a lot of things like "Should I still stay," "Will he change," "Actually what happened?," "Will it get worse after they get married?," "Will he really hit me someday?," "Will I get killed?," "When he said he will be a bastard from now on, did he mean he will cheat?"

All these were running in her head, and female said that she was surprised that this time she did not feel like crying... she did tear a bit, but not cry... I guess she was still in shock and she has actually given up hope, which explains her not crying and her suicidal thoughts. I told her when she has those thoughts, think of her father... and I told her that she has a choice to what is next... she is the expert in her life, and she is in control of it. Thus, she has the control to make decisions. She just have to stand up and be brave... and the session went on with planning together what she could do next depending on what she wants...

Monday, April 20, 2009

The Third Wheel Twists & Turns...



This world is full of very very different people... those that you think do not exist... trust me, they do. Those that I heard most about are the partner's best friend. Either the best friend is of the same or different gender from your partner... they have been there before you. So the relationship between them is totally different, and only they will understand. No one else could really understand...

Well, comes one of the latest one I heard. The boyfriend has a female best friend who does not know the limit... she calls him everyday, text him she misses him when she was away on a holiday, hugs him in public, kisses his cheeks in public with photos taken, and the list just goes on...

This client kept quiet for the longest time, until one day she could not take it any longer. The best friend not only always talks about the boyfriend's ex-girlfriend, since they are best friends, but she also brought her out on one of the nights out. She spoke to her boyfriend about what's bothering her. The boyfriend said he will take care of it...

Apparently he did, but it is still happening... so she just left it because she has finally came to an understanding where it is pointless of her arguing with her boyfriend over someone who is insignificant to her. So things were left where it was until another problem ignites.

Boyfriends second best friend finally started dating this girl. Coincidentally this girl also feels uncomfortable about the female best friend being so close to her boyfriend. Thus, the new girlfriend seek this clients advice. This client told her not to argue over the female best friend because they have been best friends for the longest time. Besides, it is pointless to argue over such a thing. This client thought she has been the bigger person by explaining to the new girlfriend that things are not what she seemed and all this are just misunderstandings.



Unfortunately, that new girlfriend has not the courage to confront her boyfriend about her dissatisfaction, she pulled this client in and said that she felt the same way too. So everyone thought that it was this client who started all this issues. Thus, the male and female best friend told the boyfriend about what she did and that it's not right of her and so on. The boyfriend was furious and they argued, they did not even celebrate their anniversary. They almost broke up and the new girlfriend called this clients boyfriend and told him that it was not this clients fault at all. Regardless the boyfriend trusts her or not, the two best friends do not. So they still think that this client was the cause of all these.

Then the new girlfriend said she would talk to her boyfriend to clear up this mess. But she did not. Apparently every time she brings it up, they will argue or he does not wanna talk about it. So now, this client is left being the bad guy with none of them wanting to hear her side of the story or anything. Instead they ostracized her and all she is left with are feelings of betrayal and totally misunderstood.


I could not help her further as the boyfriend does not want to make things better... all he said to her was "After a while, things will get better..." But this client knows that things will never be the same after this incident. This is a perfect example of "It takes two to tango." No matter how much this client wants to solve this issue, as long as her boyfriend does not want to do anything, nothing can be done. Thus, no closure and it will always be part of any future arguments... So, it is her choice now to decide what is next... She is a product of her past, but she is not a victim... thus, change has to come from her decision.